Trying to Live in Two Worlds

I came home from the American Christian Fiction Writers (ACFW) conference exhausted, but also inspired to dive back into writing my current novel. Not only are the workshops helpful, but being surrounded by hundreds of people who have the same passion for the written word is always energizing.

After immersion in a creative culture, it was difficult to return to a day job where I needed to switch over and use my left brain. I’m employed by a company who expects me to focus on logical thinking and analysis.

This past week it became even more apparent that in some ways I live in two worlds. The effort it takes to move between them can be draining. The photo I included in this week’s post is titled, “Strange Worlds.” Though I don’t live in a science fiction story, the picture is an illustration of what it felt like to be back at my job. Out there! It was a struggle to concentrate on my work. Thank goodness, several days later I was back in the swing of things.

But what I experienced made me wonder…

How often do we try to live in two separate worlds when it comes to our personal or spiritual lives?

A woman puts on a happy face in front of her friends, unwilling to let them know that her home life is miserable.

An employee teaches his children that stealing is wrong, but at the request of his employer is willing to manipulate the company’s books.

A man purchases a new car in order to look successful and then fights depression because of how close he is to filing bankruptcy.

The youth director secretly lives with her boyfriend, but tells the teenagers in the church youth group not to have premarital sex.

A young man parties on Friday night until he can’t remember what he did or who he slept with and then shows up at church on Sunday morning to lead worship.

These scenarios are all fictional. But they’re also close to reality.

Too often we lie to other people - and to ourselves – as to what’s really going on in our lives. We put up fronts in order to hide from…what?

It takes a toll on us—physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually—to try and live in two worlds at the same time. It sucks the energy from us.

For now I need to live in two professional worlds. But I only want to live in one when it comes to my personal and spiritual life. I want to be who God created me to be regardless of what I'm doing, where I am, or who I’m with.

How about you?

Dawn