Willing to Make a Change?

I think a lot about change, and frequently write about it. Maybe because I’ve experienced so much change in my life due to both choices and things out of my control.

When we become comfortable or lazy, we often avoid making change, even though it could make our lives better. In our own home, we've recently had a few situations that relay that very thing.

We remodeled a large portion of our home about four years ago and purchased a beautiful lamp to hang over a table set in a kitchen nook. I’ve included a photo here. There’s a large bay window to the left, which lets in a lot of light during the day. But in the evening, that space has always felt too dark. I thought it was because the light from the lamp shone up instead of down. The lack of light has bothered me all this time, but I thought I had to live with it. The other day, after listening to me complain, my husband decided to put in bulbs with a higher wattage. Problem solved! I just shook my head. How silly to not have tried that solution a long time ago. All it took was being willing to change the light bulbs!

I was an avid recycler before marrying my husband. I suggested to him that we recycle, but it just kept getting delayed. Neither one of us made the call; he was hesitate, wondering where we’d fit another bin in our garage. Then one day I looked closer at our garbage bill and inquired about a charge that didn’t make sense to me. We discovered that whether we recycled or not, we were being charged for a bin. Well, that clenched the deal! Turns out that with replacing our large garbage can with a smaller can and a recycling bin, we not only saved on our regular bill, we got paid for our recyclables. Go figure! We just had to be willing to make a change!

Sometimes we choose to make much more serious and difficult changes, knowing it’s the right thing to do.

When my oldest daughter and her husband decided to accept a job promotion for him and move from Seattle to Brooklyn, New York, it was hard on everyone. We’re a close family, and the thought of them living on the opposite coast was not an easy change to accept. But we all knew it was the right thing for them. My daughter is an actress. What a wonderful opportunity for her. They love their life in New York. They’re not here for holidays, but we use the Internet and web cams to be together. We all make trips back and forth from one coast to the other, and utilize Facebook on a daily basis to keep up with each other’s lives. My daughter and her husband are living their dream—but they had to be willing to make a change.

A young woman I know partied hardy in high school and college. But once she got out on her own, she found a church where she made new friends and grew spiritually. Her old friends were threatened by the changes they saw taking place, and were afraid of losing her. They were jealous of the role her new friends played in her life. She had to show them that even though things wouldn't necessarily be the same, she wasn't abandoning them or their relationship. She had to be willing to change in order to find peace in her life, but her old friends had to accept that she wasn’t the same person.

I’ve seen husbands and wives fearful of changes their spouses want to make—whether it’s returning to school, finding a job, or losing weight. The insecurity of one hinders the other from making changes. How sad. If one person is hungry for change and is held back, resentment will grow. What the husband or wife feared may happen anyway. They may lose a spouse because of not being willing to change.

The Tartar tribes of central Asia used a particular curse against their enemies. They didn’t call for the people to suffer terrible illness or death. Instead, they said, “May you stay in one place forever.” Think about it. The worst thing they could wish for their enemy was for them not to grow, but to remain stuck where they were.

If you are contemplating a change … or are faced with accepting a change you’re not sure you want … give it a chance. Don’t be afraid of trying something new.

Without changing, a caterpillar would never become a butterfly …

Dawn